Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Of stuff to write about.

There were so many things I wanted to write about. 
Painful things. 
But I decided to wait until the pain goes away to see if it would still be as awful.
Then it went away. 
It wasn't awful anymore.
Everything is wonderful again.
So I do not see the need to write down those painful things anymore.

I have been in pain for too long and been angry and sad so many times.
I had to go through all that to understand and realize that those feelings don't last.
They will go away with the passing of time.
But when I write it down somewhere, only to come back and read it again, I will only be able to see how stupid I was to have let those feelings take me down.
I am supposed to be the strong and wonderful and brilliant and amazing awesomeness.
Fell because of mere feelings and emotions.

I do not wish to be reminded of the pain that lasted a few days because I had let something happen to have caused pain. 

So I do not write it down. 

I might want to write down my joys instead. 
I just might.
But it is still few and far between. 
The sparsity of it will embarrass me.
And the people reading it.
So what is there left to write?

Life... Just me and my life as a married woman forced to be on her own.

Because I am too damned strong for my own good.

:-)

No comments: