In a moment of sheer depression, I have decided this....
There is no use hoping for him to come to me. He has said it one too many times already. He has even made the effort to make it seem real by making that first phone call after 9 months. Like a hope refresher thing.
I was depressed. About I don't know why. I wanted it to be over. As soon as possible. In a good way, in a bad way, I am not too concerned about the how. I just want it to be over.
I also talked to someone online, and he told me that the thing I said or made him believe I said... must have hurt him really bad because it hurts. Especially if it was not true.
I said "I trust you. I trust you with all my heart. But if there is someone else out there who would make you far happier than I can ever make you, please, by all means, go to her."
That was meant to mean that I trust him so much that if there is someone trying to seduce him, I would not blame him at all. And if he decides to leave me for her then it just means he never really wanted me the way he said he wanted me.
So I am hurting. And I can imagine how much I hurt him, writing what I did. I was sad. I was depressed. I was crying. So I sent him a text. I am so sorry. That was all. And with that, I let him go.
I hope he will accept my apology and finally decide it is time to stop playing games with me and walk away.
There is no use hoping for him to come to me. He has said it one too many times already. He has even made the effort to make it seem real by making that first phone call after 9 months. Like a hope refresher thing.
I was depressed. About I don't know why. I wanted it to be over. As soon as possible. In a good way, in a bad way, I am not too concerned about the how. I just want it to be over.
I also talked to someone online, and he told me that the thing I said or made him believe I said... must have hurt him really bad because it hurts. Especially if it was not true.
I said "I trust you. I trust you with all my heart. But if there is someone else out there who would make you far happier than I can ever make you, please, by all means, go to her."
That was meant to mean that I trust him so much that if there is someone trying to seduce him, I would not blame him at all. And if he decides to leave me for her then it just means he never really wanted me the way he said he wanted me.
So I am hurting. And I can imagine how much I hurt him, writing what I did. I was sad. I was depressed. I was crying. So I sent him a text. I am so sorry. That was all. And with that, I let him go.
I hope he will accept my apology and finally decide it is time to stop playing games with me and walk away.
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