of bigots

One way or another, we all are.

of marriage

I respect all married women and their choices to be married.
I wish all of you the best, as you are, THE BEST, for having the strength to go the distance with all those 'stuff' that comes with it.

But if you have a choice, don't.

People are stupid and make the worst decisions when it comes to matters of the heart.

Humans are good, intelligent, well-meaning beings.

Like you.

People, on the other hand, are none of the above.

Get out while you can.

Get out now.


Never marry. Adopt. Raise your kids well so when they grow up, they will replace these stupid people who doesn't know what they have until they lose it.


I don't care what you think.
Don't bother commenting on the contrary.
Don't bother understanding my crap.

Just don't bother.

of things that are ours and things that are theirs.

Kita nak miliki apa yang orang lain miliki, sedangkan kita tak jaga pun apa yang kita dah sedia ada.

Love grows.
Nurture what is already ours.

In shaa Allah, hasilnya sama indah kalau tak lebih daripada apa yang ada pada orang lain tu semua.

of an old lady's anguish

On the way home, the daughter stopped by at a grocery store. She got a few ringgits left in her purse, but mom had wanted some beef masak lemak cili api. So she got some beef and a few sticks of lemongrass.

In the garage at home, she dropped her car key in that tiny space between the seat and the handbrake. She tried reaching for it buy the damned thing seemed to slip further down.

She sighed. Stepped out of the car and dumped her work bag, her handbag, the bag that had the beef and lemongrass and her coffee thermos cup on the garage floor and stooped down to reach for the key which had slipped under the drivers seat.

Then she picked up her stuff from the garage door and proceeded to unlatched the unwieldy latch on the gate. Stepped on the back patio and knocked on the back door a few times. No answer. It was locked. Mom must have fallen asleep while watching tv.

She knocked again a little louder. She hoped mom would hear it. Nope. No answer. She knocked again, this time practically banging on the door like everybody else had done whenever there is no answer from inside when they know there's indeed someone home.

And on the fourth banging on the door which was much louder than the last, she she's as greeted by a blood curdling howl of fury from inside the house. It sounded like mom. Only angrier and more monstrous. There... She's made mom mad. Yet again.

All she could make out of her angry yelling was that someone had taken her money from her purse and she is super angry and now she is even madder cuz she had to pray again because I banged on the door so loud she had to stop halfway. And she also raged how all her kids are making her so miserable and that she should just die and end all this earthly sufferings.

Well, the door was usually unlocked at that time of the day. Mom must've locked it again by mistake.

That person who stole mom's money was not her, so even after the door was open, she just stood there looking wistfully into space trying to will the neighbors into unhearing whatever they had heard when mom yelled while struggling with the stupid inside latch. They were not pretty stuff to listen to.

It was a good five minutes before she picked up all her stuff from the patio floor that she had dropped after having stood there for five minutes trying to wake mom whom she thought was sleeping.

She herself had stopped taking her hypertension pills for 5 days now. Her aching joints and muscles are all better now. But until she got replacement pills from the government clinic which she does not have a referral to yet, she will have to dig deep for serenity in the midst of all the noise and chaos.

What was happening today was nothing. She went inside. Put her stuff away. Went upstairs. Took off her hijab and wiped off her make up. Turned on the ac and went back downstairs quietly. Mom had started her prayers again by the time she was back in the kitchen.

She just went and sliced the beef. Black nded shallots, garlic, ginger and chilies. Dumped everything into a wok. Covered everything with some water and put them on the stove.

As the stuff bubbled away, she typed this  story.

She texted her sister arranging a schedule between her and her sister for mom's doctor's appointment on Friday, and her Haj course on Saturday.

She also texted that person who took mom's money and told her how much trouble she was in.

Then texted her sister-in-law about it. Then her sil texted her back telling her that the money was accidentally given to the tailor by that person.

And she will have to pick up that person from her sil's place later. Poor girl. All this because of some misplaced money.

She had to pour in the coconut milk into the beef stewing on the stove now. Take a shower, pray, and go get her baby from the sitter. And go get that person too.

Mom better not stay mad by the time they all get home. And eat something. Poor woman.